Anger

I had a huge upwelling of Anger a few weeks ago. I had been feeling the tension in my body. I turned my attention to it. The pain was in my neck.

My neck had been stiff and painful for a few weeks but, my neck has been one of the area that has been chronically painful.

I focused on this area that was hurting, at the base of my neck and I asked it it's name.

"repression"

I was taken aback. I realized that the base of my neck is also my throat and got this:

The Throat Chakra is associated with the color sky blue. This chakra is our will center. The healthfulness of the fifth chakra is in relation to how honestly one expresses himself/herself. Lying violates the body and spirit . We speak our choices with our voices (throats). All choices we make in our lives have consequences on an energetic level. Even choosing not to make a choice such as in repressing our anger (not speaking out) may manifest into laryngitis. We have all experienced that "lump in our throats" when we are at a crossroad of not knowing how to speak the right words in any given situation, perhaps even stuffing our own emotions. A challenge of the throat chakra is to express ourselves in the most truthful manner. Also to receive and assimilate information. Seek only the truth.

from:http://healing.about.com/cs/chakras/a/chakra5.htm

I then visualized this knot at the base of my neck. I was black and shaped like the roots of a tree - wide on the sides and deeply rooted.

I then went in with a pick-axe and broke it all up and excavated it.

Next I got out my plastic baseball bat and my balance ball. I positioned the ball in a corner so it couldn't get away. I then told "them" what I always wanted to tell them:

• I always fucking hated you
• You were never there for me
• where the fuck where you when I needed you
• it's not my fault
• I was 8 years old! you were fucking 69
  

etc., etc.

I kept the bat around all day and when something came up, I said it out loud as I pummeled the ball.

Each time my body loosened and I breathed a little deeper.

Finally, I went running.

I used the jarring of my pace to visualize the YEARS of anger that I had stuffed or bottled up.
It was hard, black and shiny, like molten lava that's cooled into an almost glasslike substance.
The pounding of my running bounced this around in my body until is was fine glass like shards. I then visualized burning and breathing it out in dark clouds, liquid like ink leaking from my veins and clouds like a locomotive smoke stack farting it all out until the outline of my body was like misty white clouds.

It felt like relief. I felt lighter and looser and wholer than I can ever remember.

My knots are gone and my neck doesn't hurt. It feels looser than it has for years!

That should do it for a while :-)